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Web Design \ JUN 14th 2011

The 8 Most Terrible Celebrity Website Designs

Celebrities have money. That’s their one common denominator. So you would think that they could use their massive resources to build themselves (and by “build themselves” read: freelance web designers) a properly designed, pretty website. Their entire livelihood hinges on their public appearance, so you’d assume their web presence would be just as carefully manicured. Well, you’d be wrong! Check out these 8 terrible celebrity website designs.

1. Tom Cruise

Holy melodramatic, Batman! We have a super serious image of Tom Cruise staring into our souls while a corny Flash reel of some of his work plays in the background. Oh, what’s that? You want another element to assault your senses? Sure, here’s some music that automatically plays! Too much going on, Mr. Cruise.

Tom Cruise

2. Paris Hilton

This site is just hard to look at. It’s basically a huge ad for Paris Hilton. We’re already at your site! Stop bashing your brand into us! There’s so much ad placement and branding that it’s hard to navigate the site. Try using that clunky image slider at the top. It crashed the browser. Twice.

Paris Hilton

3. Tyra Banks

Watch out! It’s a pop-up splash page! You use AdBlock; it’s ineffective! Nothing is more pretentious than having a pop-up explain to you a website’s philosophy before you’ve even had a chance to explore (except if it’s signed “Fierce and Love”). Past the pop-up, you enter into Tyra’s mind, which is obviously obsessed with fashion and beauty. While I understand she is trying to build a brand, the website offers links to articles, reviews and blogs all over the place. There are 2 image galleries, a movie and over 5 other image-based articles floating on just the homepage. Where do I even begin to learn about what jeans make my hips look smaller?

Tyra Banks
4. Bon Jovi

Normally, when you go to a website, it’s really hard to find the navigation. It could be anywhere from the top or bottom of the screen to the left or the right. Oh the humanity! Don’t fret though because Bon Jovi has included at least 3 navigation bars for your viewing ease. He’s also included about 4 different places to integrate yourself with his page on Facebook, Tweet with him or sign up to his newsletter that I’m sure tells all his fans that he just added a fifth Facebook button so you can like liking him while you like liking his page. So meta.

Bon Jovi

5. Dane Cook

While the website itself is pretty functional by offering photos, news etc., the design is super serious. The stark color choice makes the website look like something Che Guevara’s followers would have made for him. Also, does the unabashed comedian really only have two photos of himself? The web designer was probably given $20 and a low resolution photo of Dane which is why the photos are so heavily coated in Photoshop filters.

6. Gwyneth Paltrow

Oh gosh, let’s feel bad for the web designer here for a moment. Paltrow must have given him/her a 30 minute spiel about how her web presence was supposed to represent her entire ideology and how she wanted to transform every visitor by Gooping them. Goop? Even though the design is pleasant, for the purpose of encapsulating a celebrity, it seems completely pretentious to tell your users what to “make, go, get, do, be, see”.

7. Jeff Bridges

Holy crap. Jeff? Did you dose yourself and your web designer when you guys made this page? This would be a great page for a modern artist who uses tree bark, marshmallows and soiled cardboard for their latest masterpieces, but for a prestigious actor like Jeff Bridges this seems inappropriate. The buttons and art all look hand drawn by Mr. Bridges, but they don’t seem to fit into the website well. A lot of the images are huge and either are awkwardly displayed in the browser or take significant time to load. Not cool, Dude.

8. Ken Jennings

While Ken Jennings isn’t in the upper echelon of fame, he certainly has enough money to afford a decently designed website. We all know phrenology was proved incorrect by modern science, but Ken has used that cheesy side-brain motif to illustrate his cranial prowess. The photos look very low quality and the layout doesn’t utilize the space well but at least if you run your cursor over the links fast enough it feels like you’re playing Simon Says with Ken’s head.


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