Rarnar Industries
"Dude. Interns and lasers. That's all you ever need."
~ Adam Rarnar
NEW PARTNERS
Rarnar Industries and Rarnar Media have been successful in wrangling away a new business venture long regarded as solely belonging to the White Law Systems.
Rarnar Media is pleased to announce the recent merger of Allied Press Corporation with Rarnar Media, rebranded as New Allied Press, establishing the first and only Gray Law System news aggregator and reporting outlet for the entirety of Terran.
The recent acquisition pushes forth a new domain in supplying relevant and unbiased news to the people of the Gray and Dark Law Systems, and we hope to further continue new business ventures in the future.
INTERNSHIPS
Rarnar Industries is currently not accepting any further applications for new internships, paid or otherwise.
We are, however, in need of Intern Wranglers and Zombie Intern Handlers. If you're between the ages of 18 to 32, we'd love to hear from you! If you think you can keep our current workforce of 6000+ interns and 1500+ zombie interns under wraps, then this might just be the opportunity for you!
We offer competitive benefits in the industry and are both Dark and Gray Law Systems friendly. If you're White Law System, you cannot apply for this position, or you'll be required to provide proof of converstion to Gray or Dark before applying.
INNOVATIONS
From biotech to consumer electronics, Rarnar Industries does it all and more!
Our recent partnership with Ascension Medical and Rarnar Medical has introduced life-saving technologies revolutionizing the way that former amputees and athletes now function in their daily activities. Introduction of the iArm and iLeg have helped both strengthen entertainment media and humanoid well-being.
Join our innovative teams in our newly opened Singapore and Russia offices today, and contribute your part to a better Terran today!
News
© 2014 Rarnar Media 1 Rarnar Way, Emeryville, CA 94608 rarnarindustries_ymail.com 525-172-7627 All Rights Reserved
Adam Rarnar - Founder and CEO
About Us
Growing up in midwest America was hard on young Adam, but he found his calling writing hundreds of lines of code to fulfill the needs of his different way of thinking. At the age of 10, he conquered the local traffic lights and control centers and was declared mayor of his town. After serving a full term running his local town, he yearned for bigger and better things and decided to give up his office - much to the subdued elation of his townfolk - and move to sunny California.
He and his childhood friend and love, Donelle, moved to Silicon Valley California to make it in the next revolution of the world: video gaming and government mind control.
His first contract with HyWire Government placed him in top secret positions designing and programming the complex soldier-interface systems for the HyWire line of automated troop transports and fighting vehicles.
He took a cue from his illustrious employer and set out to start his own faction, deep in the birthplace of such animation firms as XN3City Productions and Horowitz Pictures. It was in this place, after selling off the secrets from his employment with HyWire to certain parties in Europe, that Adam Rarnar was able to take just a decade and a half to build his Bay Area empire.
With a workforce dwarfing the efficiency of an ant hill, he set about to conquer the gaming and applications world, and dabbling a bit in medical R&D and weapons systems along the way.
In late 2008, a beta version of the iArm Mark II was completed, and Adam decided it best to shed his dominant arm to test-drive the model. He hasn't looked back since.
Business Solutions
STRATEGIC MARKETING
We employ a large staff of enriched minds and bodies, able to drive our products and services into the waiting hands of every man, woman, child and animal on this planet. Even the ones that haven't heard of an iPhone or even toilet paper or the internet.
We are THAT awesome.
And we control the weather. No other government or company ON THE PLANET can even do that. And best of all, we give that power to you. Well, to iPhone users.
Let our highly trained marketing militia help you drive your products as well. Join the Rarnar Team!
RESEARCH & DEVELOPMENT
Our state-of-the-art, cutting-edge Research and Development environments are the envy of any government or evil installation worldwide, churning out new and better Medical advances, highly addictive and interactive gaming environments, and the latest in Intern Preservation techniques.
We employ the best the scientific world has to offer and provide top-notch solutions using none other than SCIENCE!
We've been helping the US Government vaporize terrorist for the past ten years! We've helped parents of kindergarteners stop the spread of disease in classrooms with out Child Guard line of active antibacterial clothing! And, we'll be that replacement robotic hip for grandma too!
MATTER PARTICLES AND NANOTECH
A recent discovery of a teleport-capable alien dog has driven our company to strive to eradicate the world from the ties of automobiles and traffic-laden urban domains. We're currently working on standardizing the matter particle transporter already in use by the US Government for affordable use by all members of the household.
Gone will be the days of waiting in traffic, and soon will come the days of wondering if your arm or leg or head will make it to the other side!
But, if it doesn't, Rarnar Medical will be there with a patented, iPod/iPhone compatible robotic appendage to save the day!
PUBLIC RELATIONS
Our PR staffs strive daily to uphold the positive image that Rarnar Industries has worked endlessly to achieve. We've succeed in rescuing ailing firms from the downfalls of a downtrodden economy and employ millions of able-bodied and willing people the world over.
Our philantrophic endeavors are only dwarfed by the immense percentage of interns that have launched their careers and dreams with a solid foundation at Rarnar Industries.
In the coming months, Rarnar Medical will be deploying to the many African countries to cultivate and provide medical aid to all peoples of this stricken country. Our vast Rarnar family can only continue to expand.
Contact us:
